Down with the blind fanboyism: can’t we all be friends?
News flash: it's OK for other people to have different tech tastes – argues Esat Dedezade
I love Lucky Charms cereal.
It’s specially imported from the US so it costs about £7 a box in the UK. Each bowl contains approximately seventeen tonnes of sugar. The milk eventually goes green from the dried marshmallows, which are themselves so dense with sugar, that they’re in danger of collapsing into a singularity of diabetes-inducing sweetness.
I can categorically state that it is the best cereal that has ever been created. I will defend it to the death. Every other type of cereal is absolutely inferior in every single conceivable way, and I will go to tremendous, often disturbing lengths, to show you why your cereal is a terrible choice, and why your face is so stupid.
Ridiculous, isn’t it?
Replace cereal with tech. Welcome to the internet. Put your head in your hands and let the tears flow freely.
Out here, in the vast planes of online tech sites and forums, fanboys roam the wilderness. Their numbers are vast, their insults plenty and their blind faith is infuriating.
They refuse to acknowledge that their brand of choice can do anything wrong. Clearly their phone has the best camera, the best OS, the best build, hell, even the best smell.
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And that’s fine. People are free to like what they want, for whatever reason. And if they’e happy with their choice, then good for them.
But that’s the point – fanboys make it their mission to convert other people to their side like some sort of tech missionary.
From consoles to smartphones, they’ll happily tell you how terrible your purchasing decision was and recommend that you join them immediately, lest your soul is lost to the depths of inferior gadget hell.
And the saddest part of all this? They’re undying, blind loyalty, is completely unnoticed by the very companies they worship.
Do you really think there’s a Best Customer Wall of Fame at Big Tech HQ in California, littered with photos of loyal customers, which Mr Big Tech stops at every day, whispering his thanks as glittering tears roll down his cheeks? I mean, there might be, but I highly doubt it.
Stop it. I mean, you clearly won’t, but it makes me feel better saying it anyway
Let people buy what they want. Don’t try to justify your own purchasing decisions with hate-filled tunnel vision.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying you shouldn’t advise others that might be less knowledgable than you but don’t blindly cram choices down their throats.
I’m personally more of an Android user because I love tinkering and customising my devices. But that doesn’t stop me recommending a range of other devices to other people because I take their individual needs into consideration.
It’s OK for everyone to like different products, just like it’s OK for everyone to like different cereal.
As long as it’s not Bran Flakes. Dry, boring, awful texture…
You’d be an absolute moron eating those everyday.
Esat Dedezade is staff writer on Stuff.tv